Worry – this uneasy feeling, our mind focused or dwelling on something. In some instances worry can be beneficial to alert us to danger and help us pay attention and take action if needed. However in many instances, our worry can stay with us longer than necessary. Over the years we develop habits on how we handle situations and worries.
Why do we worry? We may be concerned about an outcome of a situation. There is uncertainty of what will happen. Our mind may continue to come back to these thoughts, replaying the worry and perhaps scenarios of outcomes. We may go down the thought road of “what if”. Psychology Today shares common reasons why people continue to worry. 1. By worrying, I’ll have less surprises because I have considered all the outcomes. 2. Superstition – it is safer to worry. 3. “I show I care by worrying.” 4. Worry motivates me. 5. Worrying helps solve problems. It can be beneficial to learn about your worry. Do I have this worry often? How do I feel when I have this worry? Where do I feel this worry in my body? Investigate the worry to further understand your worry and your relationship to the worry. The more awareness we have around the worry can help us alleviate the worry.
Each of us have our go-to ways of dealing with worries. Do you handle all worries the same? What are your habits? When you are worried about something, do you have a go-to remedy? There are an array of ways to deal with worries and it is beneficial to revisit these actions to discern if changing up our habits can better serve us – and alleviate the worry in a healthier way. Here are actions and intentions to consider that help alleviate worry.
“I have a worry” rather than “I am worried”. This might sound so simple but it can truly affect our consciousness. This is the idea that the worry is one element of us as opposed to taking over our entire being. This can be applied to any thought, feeling or emotion.
Set aside worry time. There are times we want to understand and play out a worry in our mind. Try setting a timer for worry time, and practice leaving the worry when the timer goes off. It might not happen right away but it is a practice – a new habit. Have patience.
Write down the worry. Whether a journal or post it note, write it down. Many times there are things in our minds that simply need a place to go outside our minds.
Call a friend. Similar to the idea of writing a worry down, calling a friend to share a worry can be beneficial in helping us to take the worry, define it in words and let go of it.
Practice Mindfulness. Mindfulness is an intentional practice, to pay attention to what is happening in the present moment without judgement. When we worry we can become lost in our thoughts and not present to our physical surroundings or even our physical bodies. Tune into what is happening around you – to the sounds, taste, feel, what you see and smell – this can help you shift the focus to the worried mind to the present moment. To learn more about mindfulness, check out the Awareness of Mind’s Mindfulness Workshop.
Take your worry to nature. Nature has a calming and relaxing affect on the body and mind. Nature gives us space for our body to move and mind to clear. It is also an excellent place to practice Mindfulness.
Relax. What to you do to relax? Is it a bath, walk outside, exercise, stretching, meditating, praying? There are many ways to relax. Consider an activity of action or intent. Movies and television shows can be relaxing but they can also be distracting, allowing us to step away from the worry momentarily and then return. Next time you have a worry, could you try something new?
Consider a professional resource. Individuals such as social workers, psychologist, psychiatrist, therapist or coach. These individuals have trained and work with individuals regularly to provide resources and could share tools to help you in your path.
Find inspiration. Inspiration could be a quote, book, or new hobby. When we are inspired, we turn our attention towards positivity. This can help uplift us out of our thought patterns. One of my favorite inspiring, uplifting and my go-to resource for helping with worry or concern is the book Perseverance by Margaret J. Wheatley. (gifted by and thanks to Catherine)
I hope you find these resources informative and inspiring. If you find that your worry has turned into anxiety – whether your own anxiety or that of your child’s, check out these upcoming workshops Katie Potocnik-Medina, LMSW is leading:
Workshop: Helping Your Child with Anxiety on April 11th
Workshop: Mindfulness + Anxiety on May 11th
About the Author: Jen Potocnik is a Certified Integrative Health Coach, and Meditation and Mindfulness Teacher. Facing chronic fatigue in her early 30s, she jumped in deep into researching and learning about different health resources – exploring Traditional Chinese Medicine, Ayurvedic, homeopathic remedies in conjunction with Western Medicine. She enjoys delving into scholarly articles to understand as much as possible about a particularly subject or topic. Jen’s focus is working with women, children, digestive health issues, sleep, and individuals seeking a specific health goal such as weight loss, flexibility or strength. She leads wellness workshops and works directly with clients one on one.